Proving once again that dorks are hot

Um, hello? Neville Longbottom got hot!

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 had their New York premiere on Monday, and the majority of the British cast crossed the ocean to walk the red carpet. I've never been shy about my love for Daniel Radcliffe, but I think he's been ousted from the top of my Hogwarts crush list. Behold Matthew Lewis who plays dorky and sometimes daft Neville Longbottom. Holy hell did he go through a transformation. He's practically unrecognizable from the awkward kid who started the series ten years ago...though in the later films I started to see that he was possibly not completely tragic in the looks department. Now at age 22, Matthew Lewis looked dapper and sexy on Monday's red carpet (not to mention that he now has about ten inches in height on Radcliffe). Hollywood watch out, this guy has leading man potential!

When two great things combine

This is TMTH. Hanson, quite possibly my overall all-time favorite band, did a cover of Russel Brand/Aldous Snow's song "Furry Walls". This song and concept is significant as one of the only funny parts of the movie Get Him To The Greek. The furry wall from the movie kinda made my life, and stroking it actually did look really comforting. So when the world hands you a Jeffrey, go ahead, listen to this and stroke the furry wall.

Striking gold in footwear

Sex and the City 2 will be upon us a week from today (I've seen it, it does not disappoint!) which means we're soon going to have over two hours worth of new fashion inspiration. Most of us don't have Carrie Bradshaw's inexplicable shoe budget, so thank goodness retail chains nowadays have no respect for copyrights and no shame in making knockoffs!

In the opening scene of the movie, Carrie wears a casual white dress with blinding Christian Louboutin gold glitter pumps (a $795 value). Bakers is currently selling a nearly identical pair of H by Halston shoes for only $79.95, and considering they're from Bakers they're surprisingly not slut-tastic. Shame on you Halston, but yes I'll take a 90% discount thank you very much. They're a bit flashy even for my taste and not my favorite trend from the new movie, but this Carrie look is one of most wearable and can easily be pulled off with any white cotton tunic dress.

The ONLY good part of "Leap Year" was...

...Amy Adams's shoes. Homegirl had no personality in this movie, no style, but pair after pair of fierce shoes that she never once complained about while trekking through Ireland's remote countryside.

What "Leap Year" (released January 8th) could have really used was less bad Louis Vuitton puns and more of Matthew Goode shirtless. Then it would have been (almost) tolerable.

I enjoy my vampires tongue-in-cheek

I am a huge baby when it comes to horror movies, haunted houses, spooky noise cassettes, people saying "boo" and basically anything else that could be considered remotely scary. Which made me wonder if I was in my right mind to sit through the upcoming movie Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant (released October 23). One can clearly tell from previews that this movie is effin weird, and it lives up to that expectation while also being really effin funny and thankfully not all that effin scary. The lighthearted tone and campy humor make this movie refreshing and bearable for total self-proclaimed wimps like myself. Finally I think I'm catching onto this whole vampire craze!

The "plot" of the movie centers around a high school boy played by Robert-Pattinson-in-training Chris Massoglia (he's only 17 so I'll withhold my smutty thoughts) who makes a deal with an aging vampire/freak show performer (John C. Reilly) to become half-vampire and serve as his personal assistant in exchange for saving his miscreant best friend from a deadly mythical spider bite. Kinda Twilight meets The Devil Wears Prada. There's also something about a war and destiny and falling in puppy-love with Monkey-Girl (complete with highly inappropriate and disturbing tail popping up metaphors). Confused? It really doesn't matter. This movie is written for pre-Twilight fans and aging sci-fi perverts so the intellectual level is pretty low, you'll catch on.

What the movie lacks in compelling or intelligible plot, it makes up for in characters, humor, and overall coolness. Standouts include Evra The Snake Boy who's so over this freak show thing and just wants to be an angsty emo singer, and Salma Hayek as the sexy bearded lady (hey, she has amazing eye makeup and bags John C. Reilly, that has to count for something). One of the "Little People" has a Dobby The House Elf-like endearing quality that makes me melt, but from what I've read on Cirque du Freak message boards this is a gross misrepresentation of the Little People (this was originally a book series yo!).

But now that I've been to Cirque du Freak message boards I may as well just get some D&D cards and a hooded snuggie and forget about any chance of a normal social life.

The Devil Wears Prada...minus the devil

It's a shame that the new documentary feature film The September Issue is only out in limited release because after America thought they were getting a look into the fashion industry in The Devil Wears Prada, this movie has surprising educational value and shows the real deal. Come see the softer side of Anna Wintour!

The September Issue chronicles the creation of Vogue magazine's 2007 mammoth September volume, but really is a documentary showcasing the hidden world of the world's most revered fashion magazine. Yes, I will acknowledge the fact that the biggest blowups were either carefully avoided when the cameras were around or respectfully edited out. But when one is constantly being followed by cameras you inevitably eventually forget that they're present and can't help but act natural (as any good reality star will tell you). This leaves me to believe that The September issue must give as close to an accurate portrayal of Vogue life as possible. Seeing this movie made me respect Anna Wintour even more than I already did and really come to like her. Sure she is firm, but from what is shown she always gives criticism in a constructive way which is refreshing to me since I think too many people have pathetically come to expect nothing less than positive reinforcement and sugar coating even in the workplace.

The film contains some genuinely funny moments that couldn't have been scripted by the best writers. Andre Leon Talley is a larger than life caricature of himself and is not apologizing for it. I only wish I could pull off wearing a Louis Vuitton blanket on my shoulders while playing tennis, complimented by a matching racket case, messenger bag, and trunk...obvi.

Grace Coddington, Vogue's Creative Director, is effortlessly comical in her many witty quips and subtle facial expressions upon learning Anna's opinions of the various fashion spreads. The standout scene in the movie comes near the end as Grace creates a photo shoot in which the documentary's cameraman appears as an accessory. Anna decides that his beer gut needs to be retouched, a decision which Grace promptly reverses. Scenes like this showcase their (playful?) tension. During these exchanges, the two women rarely speak to or learn the information directly from each other, but rather the employees break the barrier and rely on said cameraman to relay their colleagues' opinions. It all comes together in delightful comedic sequences. Through occasions such as this and the entire documentary, Grace comes across as extremely genuine and likable, the angel of Vogue if one does choose to buy into Anna as the devil.

RIP, El Chupa

Unfortunately Michael K at dlisted beat me to the Rachel Zoe joke, but I wouldn't have made one anyway because I LOVES her.

The Chupacabra is fondly known as the "Mexican Goat Sucker" and believed to be a mythical creature who preys on farm animals. Well mythical no more, bitches, I always knew homeboy was real! The Chupa(s) are described in real-life sightings as large dog-rodents with fangs, leathery skin, and sometimes spikes on their backs. I was first introduced to the Chupa in 12th grade AP Physics class, and it has since become a running joke amongst many groups of my friends. In junior year of college (circa 2006) I spent a glorious afternoon with an ex-friend watching el Chupa star in a great movie on the Sci-Fi Channel, Chupacabra: Dark Seas. In this MASTERPIECE, our goat-sucking friend (who is portrayed in a much larger, more monstrous form) somehow gets aboard a cruise ship and starts attacking all the passengers. We nicknamed it Chupacabra: Semester at Sea. Finally during a 2008 camping trip in P-Town, my friend Kelly and I were pretty sure it was going to attack us even though we were thousands of miles away from its home.

So this week el Chupa made a dumb move and decided to get himself poisoned, but this does not mean the end of him. Clearly there are more than one of these lil guys running around Texas and Mexico and probably even your backyard. It's 11am, do you know where your goats are?

Video from cnn.com

Movie review on PMS

Warning: Do not go to see Funny People when you're PMSing. This movie is already confused enough (in a good way) if it wants to be a comedy or a drama or a romance, so you really don't need to put your own emotions which are changing by the minute through that roller coaster.

That being said, do go see it! Despite creative editing in certain promos to make it look purely comical, this film is vastly different than Apatow's previous efforts. The sadness/death element is real and very present in the film which provides an interesting, and at times haunting, twist to the movie's running theme of what and who is "funny".

I laughed, I cried, I felt my lady hormones raging...all of which I'm sure were the desired reactions to Funny People.

When in Vegas...

My taste in movies is very sophisticated, so therefore I have been looking forward to The Hangover more than is respectable to admit. The Hangover tells the story of a Vegas bachelor party gone wrong where 4 guys get totally wasted, lose the groom the day before the wedding, and have to figure out what actually happened on their wild night that no one can remember...shocker. There are babies, tigers, Jagermeister, and strippers involved so obviously this movie is groundbreaking in its comedic stylings.

Truth be told though, it actually is surprisingly different than most other typical guy comedies. Though the situations that the characters experience are very over-the-top and outrageous, it somehow always feels realistic (well, somewhat) and never treads on slapstick territory. I attribute this to the casting choices in The Hangover which are far removed from the usual rotating group of Apatow/"Frat Pack" guys who would seem to be shoo-ins. With the predictable cast of Owen Wilson, Paul Rudd, and Will Farrel, this movie would take an entirely different and in my opinion less effective vibe. Casting less recognizable actors and relative newcomers to the big screen like Bradley Cooper, Ed Helms and Zach Galifianakis brought a different and more subdued acting style to what could have been a very typical movie.

Not to mention the fact that Bradley Cooper brings a level of sexiness that Will Farrel couldn't dream of matching even with the best 70's stash. I highly doubt this was the desired effect of the director, but I just about died when B-Coops walked out in the black suit. I really need to tap that. And shirtless scenes are never a bad thing. If casting a ridiculously hot guy (again, a very atypical casting choice for this genre of film) and adding several subtle melt-worthy moments were actually a discrete plan to engage the female audience who were dragged to The Hangover with their boyfriends then cudos, producers, well played.

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Mix my Vegas/Bradley Cooper fetish in with the great one-liners and quirky scenarios that this movie brings and you have me in the palm of your hand. I think guys will agree too, but obvi for very different reasons. Overall, it's def a hit.

Indie Moment: "The Great Buck Howard"

While my much more sophisticated friend Alex was in town last weekend we spontaneously caught an indie film at the Algeika Theatre, and while The Great Buck Howard probably isn't going to be winning any Oscars anytime soon, it was quite enjoyable. This movie tells the story of a young man (Colin Hanks) who goes through somewhat of a quarter-life-crisis, drops out of law school, and takes a job as a road manager/personal assistant for a washed up magician, excuse me, "mentalist" (John Malkovich).

Produced by Tom Hanks's company, Playtone, the thing that really makes this movie special is the restrained humor and the strong cast which happens to include a laundry list of some of my favs. Colin Hanks stars and has been on my "to-do" list since Orange County, though admittedly, his characters in each movie are very similar. The cast also includes Steve Zahn, Emily Blunt (who gets to have sexy time with C. Hanks...lucky biotch), and obvi a cameo by Daddy Hanks. Lesser known hottie Adam Scott plays a small but entertaining role and makes me want to see a lot more of him in the future ifyouknowwhati'msayin.

Another interesting aspect of this movie is the overall sense of time and location. In the same style as movies like Napoleon Dynamite, this movie takes place in present day America but feels like fifteen years in the past based on the fashion, decor, and depiction of American society. Whether intentional or not, this element is confusing yet enjoyable.

Though admittedly not cinematically groundbreaking, The Great Buck Howard is certainly an enjoyable movie that made me smile and chuckle, and it would behoove us all to make the extra effort to go to the indie theatres to check out.

"I Love You, Man": Deeper than one may think

The latest blockbuster comedy I Love You, Man, starring Jason Segal and under-appreciated hottie Paul Rudd, is not just another guy movie full of fart jokes and excessive drinking. Believe me, it contains its share of poo and bodily fluids, but there are actually many more heartwarming moments and real-life glimpses into the art of friendship than this movie's creators want you to realize.

No question about it, this movie is funny. The humor level lives up to expectations, but with more intelligence and genuine surprising moments thrown in. But in reality, the plot of this movie is no laughing matter: as a grown-ass adult, it's hard to make new friends!

I Love You, Man chronicles Peter's (Rudd) quest to find new male friends and a suitable best man for his pending nuptials, upon realizing that he has gone through life with only female friends. While watching his many awkward moments and misunderstandings, I really feel for this guy. How do you seek out new friends post-college...without coming off as a creeper? No longer having a forced social network, it's not as easy to platonically exchange phone numbers with someone new. Asking someone on a date seems like a cake walk when compared to asking a new gal pal to grab coffee for the first time. I've found myself in clubs somehow or another dancing, laughing, and probably drunkenly grinding with a group of really fun girls (albeit total strangers), but feeling too nervous to even simply say "Hey what's your number? Let's go do this again." Talking with other existing friends I've found that most people echo my sentiments, so chances are the strangers you randomly have a good time with would also not mind officially adding YOU to their phone book and arsenal of friends.

So let's take a lesson from I Love You, Man, put ourselves out there, and not be afraid to set up those seemingly scary friend-dates!

Blast From The Past: Alley Cats Strike

Remember back in middle school when Disney Channel original movies were the coolest things ever? No? That was just me? Oops. Well they were really frickin cool movies, and they usually had a really cute boy for tweeners to drool over. And one of my favorite movies was definitely "Alley Cats Strike" circa the year 2000. So Imagine my excitement when the Disney Channel took a break from "Zack and Cody Go On a Cruise" (or whatever that shit's called these days) and aired "Alley Cats Strike" this weekend...at 3 in the morning. This movie tells the story of a hot, popular jock joining the middle school bowling team, whose captain is your typical dorky-and-brooding-yet-still-really-sexy-vintage-loving kid. Shocker, everyone becomes friends and they win the bowling championship and thus save the school. Oscar worthy stuff, right? Kyle Schmid stars as sexy misunderstood bowling kid, and obvi I had the biggest crush on him back in the day. This movie was the perfect ending to my night on Saturday when coming home drunk at 3:30am after partying and smooching a new boy *insert swoon*. I got to live out my nostalgia while indulging in some gourmet Easy-Mac in the dark. Good times.

The next day curiosity got the better of me. What ever happened to the talented teen stars of "Alley Cats Strike"? Did their acting careers continue to prosper? So I Googled Kyle Schmid. Acting career? Not so much. Still sexy in a Zac Efron type of way? Ooooh yes...

Blast From The Past: American Pie

This movie sooo made me smile to start my week when I watched it on Sunday. (And YES I did more with my weekend than watch teen movies...kinda)

American Pie!

I personally believe that "American Pie" is so much more than your perverted typical guy comedy or cheesy teen movie. Sure, they spend a good portion of the movie talking about getting laid, seeing boobs, and the finer points of masturbation, but I've always thought this series of movies has something that most of its kind lack: heart. Underneath the surface, this movie is really about friendship. The four main characters make a pact to get laid by the time they graduate, but what the pact really symbolizes is working together, and helping each other to achieve a common goal. These guys put bromance on the map when Brody Jenner was still in braces. Forget about masturbating with pies and flutes, "American Pie" is actually about true friendship and young love.

Btw, fun game: If you had to bang one of the American Pie guys, who would it be? I'd so be all about Kevin. No, scratch that, I'd want to date Kevin, but he actually looked like he was pretty bad in bed. I'll go with Finch. I bet he gives good Tongue Tornado.

Yes! Another Teen Movie!

Just spent a glorious afternoon hungover on the couch watching "John Tucker Must Die" on basic cable. Observations:

• Some things never change. Just as with Rachel Lee Cook in "She's All That" circa 1997, it's pretty hard as a viewer to pretend that Brittany Snow "isn't hot" before her makeover. Girlfriend still looks pretty damn good. I suppose (slightly) frizzy hair is supposed to distract from perfect skin and sparkling eyes. Damn her.
• Despite Jesse Metcalf's perfect pecs, the real star of this movie is Penn Badgley! Who knew? Penn, now of "Gossip Girl" fame, really stretches his acting ability by playing...Dan Humphrey with long hair.

The teenybopper in me is so glad these kind of movies are still being made.

Dear "High School Musical 3"...

Dear "High School Musical 3",

Nsync called. They want their music video dance scenes back.

Sincerely,
Megan


.....and just for the record I did "not" fight tears during the graduation scene.