No Pants Epic Fails

There's a lot of annoying hipster shit that goes on in New York City, but No Pants Subway Ride day has got to be the most obnoxious day of the year.  As if the concept isn't bad enough, people clearly do not know the proper way to behave in public when wearing only their skivvies. If there is one at all. This is evidenced in the following things I witnessed around Union Square today:

1. Girls in Forever 21 trying on jeans in the middle of the store. You wouldn't take off your clothes to try on jeans out in the open any other day, so just because you have easy access does not make this okay.

2. People having the balls to even enter Whole Foods in only underwears, let alone browse the hot food section. This is a frickin grocery store. I'm trying to buy a chick pea salad, I should not be able to see your pubic hair.

To make matters worse, it's never the people you'd actually want to see pants-less that participate in these things, is it?

New Forever 21 - grab your hardhats, ladies! (no seriously...)

Tomorrow, June 25, at 10am the massive new Forever 21 will open in Times Square. This will probably cause the second earthquake in the tri-state area this week. The new 4 floor, 90,000+ square foot store will (sadly) occupy the former Virgin Megastore retail space. Despite the slap in the face to history in regards to the location, I'm giddy with excitement about the new Forever 21. It's larger than I can possibly imagine or comprehend, only 4 blocks from my office, and is scheduled to have normal store hours until 2am. Those hours are absolutely insane, but perfect for buying a new outfit last minute before clubbing. (I apologize to retail workers in advance for my upcoming drunk visits at 1:30am.)

Of course the grand opening has some fun and freebies to celebrate the further demise of Times Square. The first 1000 shoppers in line will receive complimentary gift cards valued at anywhere from $10-$210, and there have been additional 10% coupons for opening day floating around the internets to VIPs (like me). Other festivities include a Minx Nails manicure station, makeovers featuring F21's cosmetics line Love & Beauty, a "red carpet" photo booth, and sheer pandemonium.

Seriously, Forever 21s in NYC are a war-zone on a normal shopping day, so I'm just a little scared for this 4 floor monster on opening day. Is fear going to stop me? Absolutely not. I'll do just about anything for freebies and discount trendy clothing.

Androgyny at its finest

Caught red handed shopping in the women's department...tisk tisk, Adam Lambert. Okay, so I don't think it's the exact same item, but if you ladies want to incorporate some Glambert into your wardrobe try this grey studded jacket from Zara. It's retailing for I think $99 and is almost identical to the one Adam wore to the premiere for 2012. Studs are so hot right now, and I'm also loving the braided headband that Zara paired with the jacket for their lookbook. Forever 21 has a similar one right now for only $3.80.

Get the blues

I get bored easily with traditional nail colors (as showcased by spending most of the summer with neon yellow nails). Well, I've found my new obsession for fall in the form of blue nails, more specifically a very dark navy, or "Indigo" as is the official name of my current shade. Forever 21 has recently been stepping up their beauty game, and I came across this amazing nailpolish there from LA Girl Flare (only $2.80!). Photos do not do this color justice. I rocked it during Fashion Week and got tons of compliments from fashionistas and guys alike...no easy feat for a nail color (or anything) to be both guy-hot and girl-hot. This shade could go really wrong really fast so a few tips for blue nails:

• Pick a dark shade with just enough blue so that it doesn't look black.
• Find a shade you like and take it to your manicurist, non-traditional colors need a perfect manicure to work. In other words: don't try this at home, kids.
• Use a glossy top coat and a matte polish. NO METALLICS OR GLITTER!
• Keep the nails medium length. Too short looks childish, too long looks vampy.
• At the first sign of chipping...abort mission. Time to get out the polish remover.

Fall accessory roundup!

I've been pretty damn broke with this whole recession thing goin on so I've had to severely cut back on my shopping *cue the violins*. I can't really afford clothes anymore, but somehow I justified the purchase of a slew of cheap, gaudy, over the top accessories to fill my emotional void. Plus I found that the accessories out there (particularly at Forever) are having a really creative moment and I'm loving it:

Satin bow bobbie pins ($1.50 for a set of 2). I haven't quite figured out how to wear these yet, but they were too cute and cheap to pass up so I went with the most neutral color in the navy. They're kinda channeling Blair Waldorf, though I suspect they're going to shake up her fashion this season.

Rhinestone bow ring ($3.80). So cute it's totes sold out on the website. Just looking at the bling on this one makes me smile and almost forget we're in a recession. Or maybe I'm just having a moment with bows?

Sequin breast plate necklace ($6.80). I really think these are going to be a huge trend this fall, plus who can resist the shiny? Wear it over a plain black tee and keep everything simple. Unfortunately does need constantly adjusted throughout the day.

Plaid cats-eye sunglasses ($5.80). These are so impractical because they're pretty tack-a-rific and clash with 90% of outfits...but I couldn't resist, they made me smile. I feel like a faux hipster when I wear them (which admittedly has been once, the day I bought them), and they totally remind me of Katy Perry who I'm actually liking at the moment.

Not your dad's jacket (no offence, Dad)

When I saw this jacket at Forever 21 I'll admit that I hated it at first glance. And second. But by the third glance I started to see some cuteness potential...and not just because it's only $16.50.

I'm not usually the girl who can pull off the tough, edgy, rocker look, but finally I tried the jacket on, got yelled at for trying things on in the middle of the store (I mean helloooooo it's a jacket! I'm not waiting in that long-ass fitting room line), and saw that this could look super sexy unzipped over light dresses and other girly pieces. Also, I've been having a spring jacket dilemma because my current lightweight trench falls to almost my knees and thus is hella unflattering with flats. Problemo solved with barely a dent in the bank account! Please stick with the grey or taupe though, we don't need more wannabe scene kids running around the city in swishy bright yellow jackets.

Admittedly outerwear is expensive so at this price don't expect to be trekking through the Arctic tundra in this baby, but on a crisp spring day you'll feel warm and pretty damn cute...if not even a lil bad ass!

Dear Forever 21...

Dear Forever 21,

I'm not allowed to try on bathing suits? Really? Yet I can supposedly still return it. Worst policy EVER! So let's say I buy a bathing suit and take it home. NOW how the eff are you going to control what parts of my body do and do not touch the fabric? Bye bye weird little crotch sticker! Now that I'm not under the watchful eye of the security camera all bets are off. You do realize that this bathing suit now may come in direct contact with any number of bodily fluids, after which I can simply replace the creepy sticker and return the suit? (In the interest of good taste and not voming, I won't elaborate) After all, you have to accept the return: it's been less than 21 days, I have the receipt, and the tags are still attached. Gotcha.

Only hell no am I going to buy a bathing suit that I haven't tried on and probably won't fit into anyway! Because let's face it, what bathing suit ever actually fits? Because I would then have to make another trip back to your store, stand in the inevitable longass line, and still only get store credit back because of your lameass return policy.

So sorry Forever 21, because of your stupidity Old Navy got my bathing suit purchase this year. And I hope your bathing suits get cooties.

Disappointed,
Megan

Forever 21 strikes again!

Since the "Sex and the City" movie came out in May, I have been simply lusting for Carrie's black studded belt which she wears for about a fourth of the movie. The actual belt is from SATC stylist Patricia Field's collection, but I refuse to spend $120 on a belt no matter how fab.

Now, a good studded belt is hard to find, and 99% of the time I would recommend staying clear. You can't just throw on any ole crap that your 15-year-old wannabe emo sister got at Pacific Sunwear and call it fierce.

Since Forever 21 has no shame when it comes to making exact copies of other people's designs, they just came out with this beauty, the Pyramid Stud Waist Belt (retail $9.80). The only difference is that the Forever version has elastic in the back where I believe the Patricia Field version is leather all the way around. Get this while you can, it's so close to Carrie's belt I'll be surprised if it lasts 2 days in the stores (already gonzo on the web). Wear it over a simple dress with a full skirt (H&M has a great deep purple one right now) or a light trench.

Btw Forever 21, I so smell a lawsuit. Luv ya!

Celeb bargain fashion

On Tuesday's episode of the new "90210" series on the CW, rich bitch Naomi would love us to think she's wearing some uber-expensive outfit, as always, to Silver's party. Jig's up, Naomi, it's actually from Forever 21! Naomi's red satin ruffled tank is even one of Forever's "fabulous finds" (translation: even cheaper than normal). It's sold out in solids on the website, but if you're lucky you can still find it in stores for $12.50, though it's been sold out in NYC for weeks. I have this top in solid purple, and it's a great go-to piece with dark skinny jeans and some fierce heels. You can also still find it on forever21.com in some tickity-tack prints.

Love the modern Victorian elegance of the solids. The prints, not so much.

And love that the CW is putting some fashion on their characters that real girls can afford!