8:03pm - Rated R standing in front of a graffiti wall with a pulled up hoodie...so is he a white rapper now or something? Also soooo excited for Michelle Money to be here!
8:09pm - "Take a Jake and wipe my Pavelka"?! Wow, I forgot how poetic Kasey can be. That's a quote that needs to be set to music. Shit I hope I'm not giving him any ideas.
8:10pm - Jake for biggest reality whore of the year? I didn't even know networks let you be on two shows at once. (this and Famous Foods)
8:17pm - Who the eff is Erica Rose? Are we sure she isn't actually Devorah Rose from High Society?
8:19pm - Ugh moms should not be going on Bachelor Pad, ELLA! Irresponsible parenting! Sob story or not, good mothers do not go on the smuttiest of reality shows. This rule does not apply to Michelle Money because she's unapologetic about her entertainment value and I loves it!
8:29pm - If Holly was going to kill a muppet to wear as a skirt, couldn't she have at least skinned enough fur off of it to cover her Miss Piggy?
8:35pm - I love how much of a horn dog Blake is being this season! Maybe actually showing some personality will keep him around a bit longer this time.
8:42pm - Rated R jumps on my muppet pun bandwagon. Nice! And agreed, Kasey and Vienna are vom-worthy.
8:45pm - According to Holly, Blake "uses pretty big words which is reallllly attractive." This girl is quickly becoming my favorite person to make fun of. She makes it so easy!
8:47pm - Kirk seems to have gotten uglier which is a shame because I had a pretty big crush on him. At least William is here to bring some hotness! There's a lot of blonde guys on this season which is weird but awesome for eye candy (so my type). Plus blondes have more fun which is better for TV. Obvs.
8:55pm - Jake's cheesy fake-surprised facial expression when meeting Kasey was the best thing I've seen in my life. Proof that reality TV is real because clearly these people can't act.
8:59pm - Jake pulls Kasey aside for a Man Talk to try to clear the Vienna-filled air, and I really wish I could understand what Kasey was saying because I bet it would be pretty dramatic.
9:09pm - Ames and Jackie: first new couple in the house to get a little makey-outey. Good job, Ames! Way to step it up and be a man!
9:11pm - So their first challenge (yah, they do those between having romps in the fantasy suite) is to be suspended in a harness in what's totally a sex position, and hold onto each other for as long as possible.
9:15pm - Holly would rather be drinking, so she lets herself fall. Just had to point that out. Priceless. Mature.
9:24pm - Vienna is so considerate of her boyfriend's health and well being. His leg and back are cramping with intolerable pain, she yells at him because Jake might get immunity. Supportive. Jake wins.
9:28pm - Vienna is a horrible person! But I guess we knew that already. In the hot tub (obviously) she continues to rip him a new one for not winning the challenge and fighting with her on camera. Isn't she actually picking the fight? It seems like their "strategy" coming into the house was to just win every challenge, but how is that a sound strategy? Eventually there would be a challenge about being a decent human being or making responsible decisions with tattoos, and clearly you wouldn't win those.
9:39pm - Rated R is actually (for once) using his lying powers for good after pretending to be in "the main alliance", but secretly being a swing vote. I applaud that, I've watched enough Challenge type shows to know that if you're on the outskirts of the big alliance you will get screwed.
9:43pm - This effing show is going until 11:00 tonight? Didn't plan for this and my computer battery is about to die. Time out. Recharge!
10:54pm - Bachelor Pad may be one of the best shows on TV, but three hours is a bit much even for the most riveting mindless trash. Alliances were formed and broken and secretly formed, and eventually we were left with Rated R and Alli being voted off because they were wishy-washy sneaky bitches. Alli can go as far as I care, but losing Rated R this early is a travesty in the reality world! Like, totes more tragic than the stock market crashing today. Rated R being gone decreases America's level of being entertained and that is not cool.
